Somewhere Between

I felt so much, 

that I started to feel nothing

I wanted to say so much, 

That I said nothing

Yet that was everything.

Too much of everything. 

Stop me before my heart

begins to race

I'm reliving every second

I promised wouldn’t leave a trace 

You can look back sometimes,

But don't ever fully turn around.

Those feelings are an anchor,

Proof you are alive.

Because at least you can feel.

Reach into me with your hands

And your fingertips will kiss 

the nothingness,

That inhabits inside.

You can drown in emotion

Just as easily

As you can drown in silence.

You learn both. 

Somewhere between the two

The lines blurred

And I misplaced myself. 

I can't explain my existence in metaphors.

I can dress it up

with pretty comparison

Or soften it with imagery,

But that would make it beautiful 

When it isn’t —

I love poetry

But this is not poetic. 

Just a body

Moving like effort is the villain.

And if I am everything,

Then I am only what remains

After nothing has run out.

I felt everything,

So it turned into nothing.